Messy.

(a semblance of poetry)

 

Are these just cracks in my foundation, or constellations in my sky..?

It’s all so much: a best friend’s chronic depression, love songs (songs I can’t quite love), a baby friend with a fearless, fiery heart, a hopeless case of wanderlust, & a God who won’t let go.

Life has forgotten the words “slow down,” and I’ve forgotten how to breathe (already). My best friend had forgotten what living, real living, was, until last week, she was electrocuted awake, and I’ve forgotten what his veins feel like under my fingertips and what I thought those songs told me. My baby friend suddenly outgrew me this summer, so quickly, so strong, and my God holds me tight. tight. I thought it was me holding, clinging him to my chest, relentless, but all along it was his hands that never let go.

You love me. You love me. You love me.

dang.

Your sunrises simultaneously kill me and resuscitate me; your humans explode my heart with feeling and aliveness and hope, and God, you fill me.

Your grace, relentless; be fuel to my bones, my bones.

Don’t let go of me.

 

be gentle, be patient.

– allison nicole –